What truly matters and is truly important to you is one of the best. Loosen the habits that no longer define you. Enjoy more of the happiness you deserve and share. Celebrate and express that with the people that you love.
One of the challenges over time has been getting caught up in that getting caught up in an idea about it and that leading to you. Hypnosis is just communication. It’s just part of life. Its expectation and suggestion built into every experience we have. It is part of every fall of my life. And when I share it with people, I often warn them that hypnosis. Can consume, not just consume you, but suddenly you see it everywhere. It’s like a new set of glasses. And suddenly you’re looking through these tinted spectacles and you’re seeing it when it, within everything.
Another challenge sometimes is to put it down, to just listen to the surface level of conversation. We don’t need to be interpreting things sometimes it’s just communication. I apply this to everything. Trying to share the good piece, the common piece, which is the world is made of words that it’s built into everything that we do, that communication is the key and how we speak to ourselves, is the most important part for us to be mindful of because there’s no filter there. There is a feel for if someone else is criticizing you there’s, there tends to be no filter when we speak to ourselves.
There are these times as entrepreneurs, as business owners, as humans, that at the moment, whether it’s a good moment or there’s some resistance, or there’s a trigger, there are times where we feel that it’s all in golfing and all-encompassing, and like we can’t get out. Humans entrepreneurs, business people, anything like what are some of the things that they can do to be able to recognize those, like create awareness around them and maybe even shift out of those things.
It’s a very common conversation with all of them. This fresh analysis of technology and how we use it. A lot of people on the back that a social dilemma is taking a false from technology is one example. And that’s one thing, taking a break on something, taking yourself out of that, essentially the equivalent to going on a little retreat is one thing, but what follows that is the important thing. Especially with business processes and practices and our own story, every now and again, I think we need to do that. Take a break, and then come back to it in a mindful way and think. It’s about backing off every now and again, you know, reasserting your intention upon your activities and your processes. And not doing that rather than getting character love and then just getting carried away with them. So there are lots that entrepreneurs can be doing to manage their, monitor, and manage their emotional regulation, especially when it comes to decision-making. So they’re not necessarily so reactive. So easy grab buttons to just get pressed. And then to go through the illusion of decision making and choice. When in fact you’re just reacting, you would just be experiencing, you’re just a pattern-matching machine, and those responses are just coming out of you predictably. It’s easy to lose
The hypnotizing people
It’s about waking people up to the fact that the behaviors, the getting in the way of their success or their life or their happiness. All patterns or habits, drilled into the machine. It’s just that we do them. We have experience of choosing when, in fact. It’s entirely predictable, which way you’re going to go. Cause that’s what he did last time. And that’s what you did last time. And that’s what you did the time before we can break those patterns. By, first of all, recognizing them for what they are. These are learning experiences more often than not. They were learned on the back end of an emotionally charged experience.
In order to get to rip it, to recognize that even what we know from the neuroscience is that when we’re experiencing that high level of emotion, the activity in that part of us that thinks, and is rational and uses language in a kind of meaningful way tends to decrease. And we’re much more likely to just respond. Now there might be words coming out of our mouth. There may be actions, this is going to be the kind of stuff we look at later on and say, I don’t know why I said that. I don’t, I don’t know what I did. I didn’t mean that and where does it come from? It doesn’t matter so much I don’t think we necessarily need to dig into the history. It’s just that’s what happens when there is a high emotional charge
Shifting your focus to the absolute priority. It’s a lot easier because if our self-worth is tagged to a bunch of goals, whether they’re achievable, achieved, or not, then we’re setting ourselves up for a problem because If it’s reliant upon those things, then it suggests you haven’t done the work. It suggests that or at least that there is work to do. to do that as an entrepreneur, it’s easily ignored because you can be so busy and you can be on a mission and other things holding you up or blown away by your energy or, or what you’re achieving. And it’s easy to skip doing the deep work on yourself that would require you or would enable you to still be happy. if that, if that talk it wasn’t here. if the business just disappeared completely and you had to pivot and do something unimaginable for a while, then is there still the possibility for you to have a sense of peace and a sense of happiness? I think there is absolute if you’ve done the deep work on yourself, and sometimes that involves shifting. Again, patterns, habits of mind that have been there, for as long as again, based on one or two or 10 experiences, when you were younger, you can sort to think that’s you.
Revisit and Reassess
Essentially we don’t need to be regressing we just need to revisit and reassess every now and again and see it with fresh eyes in a calm state. Then we get the opportunity to change those things. Again, if we don’t, then at some point, you’re not going to meet. a particular bark thick in a pedestal that you’ve put your sense of self upon. And then it’s highly likely that you’re going to wobble and start to ask questions. And those questions are the clue. Those questions, the questions actually are the tool. They are the blade of inquiry. We need to use it if you want to do this deep work. And that takes some courage. It takes a certain level of sensitivity.
There’s no measuring stick when it comes to trauma, it’s all relative, but there’s trauma. And one of the things that I’ve noticed a lot is that I had this belief forever, because I experienced this high level of emotion and trauma, that the modality to help me out had to match that energy for it to be effective.
I think there’s a problem actually in psychotherapy and many other kinds of modalities in that. And it’s almost a legacy of what Freud gave up, which is that we need to go there. We must go there. We must uncover, remember re-experience, which is a disgusting thing to do to people who have been deeply traumatized if you really think about it but it’s there as a backbone in many systems of therapy and because often provokes the swing, describe the emotions high enough think both the therapist and the client can think this is it. I’m doing it. This is therapy is what I came for. Some pain is here. This must be it. And often it just leads to more of that. It’s Historical archaeology into your own, past.
You’re going to do that with all the strengths and understandings you have now. As an adult, in your case, outside as a man, as a father, all the understandings you have now,, with a teenager and a young child. So look at it again from a kind of distance, look at it again, and keep anything useful. You may have gained from that experience, but this is what I want you to do. I want you to. Dropdown beside that younger, you thank them for going through that, let them know they came through that, and tell them exactly what it is they need to hear and give them permission to let go of any of those negative emotions. And when you get a sense that it’s done, I want you to just see them with a smile on their face, waving goodbye as they free you forever. So that kind of. Peace. It’s not that it’s just a script, but it’s that light touch. We don’t need to go into every detail. We don’t need the drop into our body and feel it again, we don’t need to be retraumatized in that fashion. If we’re going to look at something, let’s do it. Knowing we came through it, even if it was. A difficult meeting last week, or we blew a deal or whatever it happened to be, look at it again, keep anything useful and essentially let go of any of the emotional charges that are there. It’s, there’s something learned. There’s something we can take from it, even the toughest experiences.
If we have the courage to do this kind of work, ultimately it gives a sense of completion. And there’s something about this organism. There’s something about our brain that when it’s complete, it’s done. Whereas actually, we’d been carrying that kind of partially filled template without an appropriate conclusion for decades in many cases. So even though we’re, you said realities plastic a couple of times, even though we just we’re just rewriting that the end, if you like of the story, we’re giving it a conclusion where we’re satisfying it. Then it says, if our brain is no longer seeking that says, I’ve heard you say this stuff about language and when we’re seeding ideas to people opening up these kinds of incomplete streams. And it’s true because there’s this kind of search going on, not just for meaning, but for completion. That’s what we’re used to. That’s how things have been drilled. It’s used to open up, thanks for creativity, and really for just commanding attention. But when it’s our own story when it’s our own history, is that yeah, every now and again, we need to say the end and it’s no different when we’re pitching out into our future and that’s causing us anxiety more often than not. They’re easy to learn. They’re easy to apply. You don’t need a therapist, to be honest, it’s just, sometimes it’s nice to relax and let someone be the guide. All of this stuff can be self-applied and then being present.
We can keep cutting. We can lose parts of the body and we can continue to be intact and so forth and so on. So the initial part of the process is you sit with this question. And that is the first part of this revelation. You’re going to come up empty-handed, nothing. He’s going to satisfactorily stick to display, to the inquiry. And there is a moment there going from something, I’m this, I’m a father, I’m an entrepreneur. I’m a success. I’m a whatever to nothing which perhaps for some people sounds terrifying, but for many others, it’s exactly what they’re going to seek and travel the world and pay good money to achieve a moment like that Or a moment of nothingness. To deepen that inquiry. You went in failing. If you like to find a center, an edge, age, and name, you then begin to look at your experience and we tend to then go in the other direction to try and find, I’ve taken you through some of these exercises, try and find a boundary. Between your inner experience and your outer experience between the feelings inside of you, the voice in your head, and my voice. If you really do to again, sit as the answer, sit quietly, and do the work. Then you’re going to see them, all of this activity is taking place in the same. Space, if you want to put it that way, it’s the only thing that seems to reliably be present in all of your experiences. And that is your sense of being present and aware.
You could, someone could put this to you and you could have this experience within minutes. Is to the move is from something that you felt pretty sure about, but, the suffering to nothing as a moment of nothingness. So then an expansive inclusive sense of being connected and what I’d say about this is what you’re recognizing is as far as I’m concerned, closer to your true nature. So rather than searching for happiness in the acquisition of objects you see. When you were provided with a moment of happiness, when you hit a target or you got a thing, actually what you experienced was calling off the search for a moment that, that, that search was gone. Exactly the same when we. Search for peace by going to some wonderful location, for sure. There’s beauty there and you can feel connected to what’s around you there, but it shines from you. This experience is coming from you, not just from the outside
So without getting too philosophical about it, I think this inquiry is something that. Any of us can do, if you think about it, the vast majority of therapeutic techniques, especially the more imaginative visual techniques, the first step is to observe, be the observer. Look at that again, see yourself there. And we often think of that as just being in the third person or is dissociation. I think it’s closer to recognizing yourself as you are, as the witness of. Thoughts and feelings that you yourself and not thought and feeling as the knower of your experiences.
It’s a cutting away, which is a kind of Advantech kind of move. And then it’s, an opening up and a reconnecting and, there are three ways in a lot of people get that via meditation. That’s not really the main for me. What I’ve been talking about. There is more of an inquiry and I think the other way of benefiting is contemplation. And when I say that, taking a sentence. This is how I benefit most from your work is because you’re extremely good at this. You can pop a question out or you can lay down a sentence and. It’s all in there. If, if, if I was to let me think of some things that affected me at the beginning of the last few months, that you said one of the things I first heard you say was, what are you doing to get people to their after state? Whether they buy your products and services or not.
Be curious, the curiosity piece is the main piece. It’s like stay curious if something comes up and it’s difficult, uncomfortable, or irrelevant. It doesn’t matter. Be curious, be interested. Like you’d never been interested before, and again such a power in it. I’ve really overlooked it myself. Contemplation, what does it even mean? but that’s what it means to me is it’s taking these gems that had an impact and recognizing their work may not be full, no, on a phone, just every now and again.
So I would simply just remind people that you can do this. You can take charge of this. And, you know, as we’ve been in today doing a bit of the work around your sense of self and what truly matters and is truly important to you is one of the best, but just to store often a lot of those habits of the body and those habits. Loosen their grip. They’re no longer defining you. And that is, something that’s going to enable you to enjoy more of the happiness you deserve and share, and celebrate and express that with the people that you love.